Something to brighten up this place. And my day.
Aug 25 2010
Ghosts of Boyfriends Past
You know you do it. Sometimes you google the names of past boyfriends or girlfriends, to see if you can find out what they’re up to. Sometimes you look him up on facebook to see if his security setting lets you see more than his name. I have one ex in particular that i look for who hasn’t made it onto facebook yet, but i still check every few months.
As i was walking to my car yesterday, i heard my name called in the parking lot from someone who was backing out of a parking space. I glanced toward the vehicle, and didn’t immediately recognize the profile. I walked toward the car and leaned down to look in the passenger-side window.
I had no idea who it was.
Then ensued the awkward moment where it is obvious i am drawing a blank. He saved me, though, by pointing it out, “You don’t remember me, do you?” and then told me his name, which rung a bell. He DID look a little familiar, but that was half a lifetime ago…
I’ll be honest, while i do remember that this guy existed, i don’t remember much else. This is what i do remember: He went to a different school. We met at a swim meet. His dad was the coach of his high school’s team. He said the word “tour” so strangely (more like “tore”) that i had no idea what word he was saying. We talked on the phone. We kissed a few times. We were one year apart in grade level, but i can’t remember who was older. I think i was 15.
And that is IT. This is one boyfriend that i have never wondered enough about to look up on facebook.
I doubt i would have recognized him if he hadn’t told me who he was. And now i feel all weird about it because if i couldn’t recognize him how come he recognized me? Did i break his heart or something so he spent years throwing darts at a picture of my face?
No, no, of course not. Some people are just better at remembering faces than others, and i am one of the worst at it. We’re going to have lunch one day next week and catch up. It should be fun – now that i have been reminded of his existence, i actually AM curious about what he’s been up to.
I even tried to find him on facebook, but apparently he’s not on there either. Why are my ex boyfriend’s averse to facebook? Don’t they know i’m over here trying to stalk them?
Apr 19 2010
On the DL
Baseball season is here! Every year, Lance is like a little kid with how excited he gets about baseball. It’s also softball season. Lance has been playing softball this season with some people that i work with. Even though their team has been stomped a few times (the “mercy rule” has been invoked more than once) and hasn’t won a game yet, he’s very happy to be playing again.
I’ll give fair warning now that there is a disturbing picture at the end of this post. Stop reading if you don’t want to wince, cringe or hiss through your teeth.
You see, Lance is now on the Disabled List (DL). In his fifth game with the softball team, two weeks ago, he was running the bases. He was jogging around third and then realized he needed to speed it up in order to make it home before the ball, so he picked up the speed, and then suddenly felt spasms and was limping towards home. He was safe, barely, but had pulled his right hamstring.
The pull was pretty bad. Two days later, he was limping past the mirror and caught a glimpse of the back of his leg. It had some pretty severe purple splotches. Notice there is a slight discoloration in the calf, but most severe right above the knee.
A few days later, even more purple was beginning to show, and eventually the whole back of his leg was purple, and it was seeping down into his calf. The second picture was taken eight days after the initial injury. (I wish i’d caught it about 5 days after – that was at its worst.)
By this time, he wasn’t having anymore pain, but obviously it looks pretty bad. His doctor said it was the second-worst hamstring pull he’s ever seen. Sheesh.
It’s now two weeks later, and the leg still looks pretty bad, though it’s starting to clear up. We just have to wait it out.
His softball team is impressed with his bruises.
Jan 21 2009
This is the Dude Who Loves Me
I’ve mentioned him, and there has been a picture or two of him on this blog. But here’s a more official introduction – meet Lance.
Lance is my favorite person. He makes me laugh. He can laugh at himself, which i think is important to be able to do. He’s smart, and loves philosophizing about people and about the world. He’s good to his dog. He is always trying to improve himself, and really, what else is this life for? He is extremely passionate about his interests. He always treats me with respect, and is supportive of my interests. He gives a lot of himself to others.
And he’s given a big part of himself to me. I am lucky – he is my best friend, and i get to hang out with him all the time. How cool is that? (-: I love you, sweet thing.
I would like to share this poem by ee cummings that Lance has made special for me.
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
Oct 24 2008
Detached
I woke up this morning and i felt like Carrie Bradshaw from Sex & The City, the morning she realized she was no longer in “the nook”.
At night i like to turn the heat off, or way down, so that the air outside the covers is a bit cool. It makes it that much more cozy under the covers. But when i woke up this morning i realized i was only half as warm as i wanted to be, because the only body heat around me was my own.
I could have closed the gap myself, but i didn’t.
I’m not quite sure how we got here, or where we are exactly. It feels funny.
Sep 18 2008
Middle of the Night
Dear Lance,
When you came home at 4:30 am after poker night with the boys, i was awakened from slumber by our dog, who barked to warn me of danger. Thus i was just barely awake to greet you. I would like to officially inform you that the reason i didn’t want to philosophize with your Chatty Cathy self at that moment about politics or the psyches of the other poker players, was not because i was mad, or because i find you uninteresting. It was simply because it was 4:30 am. I had been asleep moments before, and wanted to be asleep again. That’s all. I promise to converse at length with you on that subject matter the next time we have a chance, as long as it is during the day.
Love, Podrey
Aug 24 2008
Yesterday’s Favorite Moment
At a dinner party to celebrate a friend’s birthday. Wearing a sleeveless shirt. Conversing, laughing. Lance sitting next to me, casually reaching over to slip my bra strap back up underneath my shirt.